And yet another year comes to an end! Another 365 days of moments that could have become memories if only we had let them. Time that has slipped by, unconsciously....one day at a time...and this treasure of time… of 2022 will never come back again.
The birthday visit to an old friend that you intended but chose to send a cake instead will not be back....nor the time your sister needed you and you meant to visit her, but made a phone call instead. The family prayer meeting you skipped because of important office work; these are all moments that will never be back. Do they matter in the big scheme of things? Possibly not. But did you miss an opportunity to turn a moment into a memory? Absolutely yes.
Life is eventually just a bunch of stories that become a rich narrative of who we are as people. Our purpose and goals are a big part of that storytelling, but it certainly isn't all who we are…is it? If we can remember this, and if we can consciously remember to make memories out of moments, just imagine how much joy we could spread.
Children, in particular, don't care if we are big important people. They know nothing of our fancy titles; all they want from us is our time. No matter the age, all children look forward to family traditions and family rituals that help them feel warm and fuzzy inside, whether it's tea in our parents’ room or the party you throw every year for grandparents... because that's what memories are made of. The kids getting into mummy papas quilt on a cold wintry weekend and just being silly....so look for ways to bring tradition to your family. Tradition is not religious but something that is unique to you and your loved ones. A Sunday visit to grandma and grandad to hear the stories you have heard a million times before, making your daughter's favorite dish, going to the swings every evening after work, or taking a moment to ask what they learned in school. Each one is embedded in a child's subconscious mind, only to be retrieved later, as a good memory.
The same holds true for couples. Once the fuzzy feeling of romance has subsided, we need to recreate the magic. Consciously and intentionally, look for moments you can turn into memories. A weekly date to your favorite restaurant or just a walk every evening together after dinner. Beautiful rituals that are cherished.
At a family function, I always look out for the old people, the unseen people, to show them excitement to have met them and also to tell them how good they look. Sometimes it is these small acts of kindness that they carry with them for days. I recall going some years ago to Pune and paying a visit to a friend's mother, who is now a widow and lives by herself. I can't recall what exactly I said but I know it was something she could share with her friends in the park, something to share with her children when they called her. I wanted to leave her with a story, and that's what we should always aim to do always, leave those we love with little teeny tiny stories that they can share with someone else. My father is a master at this; as children we lived on a series of surprises. Beautiful flowers and gifts till this day arrive like magic on any special occasion. We would be whisked to a new movie on a school night. We would sit on our parents' bed, dip biscuits into their tea, and tell multitudes of fascinating stories about growing up in difficult times.
Don’t look for the perfect moment; they will be gone before you know it. Like the year 2022 has in the blink of an eye. With all the other resolutions you will make this year, try not to forget this one. Ask yourself, “Did I turn a moment into a memory?”
If we have nothing else to give another, surely we have kind words to share. This new year, commit to making more memories, telling more stories, and giving out lots of hugs.
A big hug to all my readers.
Wish 2023 brings you an abundance of joy, love, respect, and kindness.
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